Jerry connects with a Miss America pageant contestant, Miss Rhode Island, at a Yankees game and asks her out on a date. They have to have a chaperone however and and Kramer volunteers. It turns out Kramer knows a lot about how to win a beauty pageant and is soon Miss Rhode Island's personal trainer. After being turned down for a job at a major book publisher, Elaine is hired by Justin Pitt as his personal assistant. Her first task is to go out and buy him new socks. George meanwhile is surprised to learn that the Yankees uniforms are made of polyester and switches them to cotton, with major repercussions. Written by garykmcd

George gets upset when he buys a large salad for Elaine but his girlfriend Julie gets the thanks for it. Elaine can't believe it when he raises with her and it all gets back to Julie which doesn't bode well for George. Jerry has a new girlfriend but begins to reassess his feelings when he learns that she went out with Newman - and that he dumped her, not the other way around. Kramer gets into an argument with his golfing partner, a former baseball player, who later loses his temper and is sought by the police. Kramer is certain that he caused it all and helps his buddy out. Written by garykmcd

Jerry hosts the annual PBS pledge drive and asks George to get some of the Yankee players to appear on the show. George comes through and gets Danny Tartabul to appear on the show. Kramer discovers that Jerry has been getting some birthday cards from his Nana with money inside. He cashes them in and suddenly Nana's bank account is overdrawn. Nana then goes missing. Jerry gets in trouble with Elaine's friends (one of whom has an unusually high voice) when Elaine starts a rumor that the wife was hitting on Jerry. George thinks everybody is giving him the finger and decides to follow one offender while driving Danny Tartabul to the pledge drive. Kramer volunteers to become a phone-answerer for PBS and Elaine discovers that Mr. Pitt eats his candy bars with a knife and fork, starting an unusual trend. Written by halo1k

Jerry gets a date with a woman, Donna Chang, who due to a technical fault with the telephone lines is getting all of George's calls. He thinks she's Chinese but soon realizes that's not the case. Elaine and Jerry see George's father talking to a strange looking man wearing a cape but it's Donna who gets the scoop when she speaks to George's mother. Elaine is having trouble talking to her friend Noreen because Noreen's friend Paul won't stop chatting when she calls so she's taken to just hanging up, something that has a effect on Elaine and Paul's relationship. Kramer meanwhile is worried about his fertility, wondering if he's the last of the Kramer line. He goes to a clinic but is unnerved when the doctor tells him to stop wearing jockey shorts. Written by garykmcd

Elaine dates a moving guy, and things are going well for her until Jerry wants to know what his opinion on abortion is. Poppy returns and he and Kramer are going into business together to create a restaurant where you make your own pizza. Meanwhile, George goes out of his way to cheat on a book club test by renting Breakfast At Tiffany's instead of reading the book. Written by halo1k

George's girlfriend's mom thinks he is a bum when she catches George eating an éclair out of the trash can, among various other coincidences. Jerry dates a woman who is a former Olympic gymnast and ventures into the territory of sexual pleasures that most men dare not dream of. Elaine tries to pry Mr. Pitt away from looking at Kramer's new 3-D art poster. Meanwhile, Kramer gets a kidney stone. Written by halo1k

Kramer convinces Jerry to get a free Armani suit from hack comic Kenny Bania. But when Bania decides that he doesn't want anything except for dinner, Jerry has a hard time accepting the suit knowing that there is a far greater catch involved. Things get even worse when, during the dinner, Bania insists that soup doesn't count as a meal. Meanwhile, Elaine has a British friend stay with her for a week. Written by Anonymous

Kramer decides to help out a small mom and pop shoe repair shop by sending business their way. As part of his project, he cleans out Jerry's closet and sends all of his sneakers to them for repair. Kramer's suggestions for repairs in the shop send the old couple into bankruptcy. George has been looking for a new car and makes his choice buying a car that was supposedly once owned by Jon Voight. It turns out that Elaine knows quite a bit about big band music and her correct answer in a radio contest lets her boss Mr. Pitt do something he has always wanted: hold the giant balloon of Woody Woodpecker in the Macy's Thanksgiving parade. Jerry isn't sure what to do when he seems not to have been invited to a Thanksgiving-eve party. Written by garykmcd

George is authorized by the Yankees to get himself a secretary and he's decided not to hire an attractive woman as it would be too distracting. It doesn't really make a difference. Elaine is having a problem with an expensive dress she's recently bought and is convinced that the store is using 'thin' mirrors. Jerry thinks he sees his dry cleaner wearing his jacket at the movies. Kramer gets Uma Thurman's phone number and writes it down on Jerry's dry cleaning ticket. Written by garykmcd

When George notices that Elaine's new boyfriend reads the Daily Worker, he asks if he's a Communist. He says he is, which Elaine seems to wear as a badge of honor. Thanks to his friend Mickey, Kramer gets a job as a department store Santa. Things start out okay but veer off after he reads some literature from Elaine's boyfriend. George answers a personal ad in the Daily Worker and soon everyone in the Yankees front office thinks he's a Communist. Jerry meanwhile learns that his new girlfriend's boss is an old high school rival he once beat at a track meet and has accused him of cheating ever since. Written by garykmcd

Elaine loans Mr. Pitt's expensive tennis racket to an executive from Doubleday who hints there may be a job opening for Elaine soon. When the woman injures her arm, Elaine can't quite get the racket back. Jerry's girlfriend never smiles or laughs at his jokes but her roommate laughs at everything he says so he contemplates the switch. George comes up with an idea as to how he might get away with it. George's girlfriend, a model, eats like a horse but never puts on weight. Kramer suggests she might be bulimic. The gang learns Kramer's first name, thanks to his mom Babs. Written by garykmcd

Jerry gets Super Bowl tickets but cant use them because of obligations to attend a friend's wedding. He gives them to Tim Whatley and gets a label maker in return. Elaine is convinced that the label maker is the exact same one that she gave him a week before. Jerry then accuses Whatley of re-gifting the label maker. George, learns that his girlfriend has a male roommate and gets weirded out by the concept, but loves the male roommate's possessions which include a velvet couch. The couple learns that the wedding is on the same day as the Super Bowl and then calls the wedding completely off because of it, and Jerry goes in search of getting his tickets back. But then Jerry learns that Whatley gave one of his tickets to Newman. Meanwhile, Kramer and Newman engage in a heated game of Risk. Written by halo1k

Kramer is walking down a street and sees a man littering. He calls the guy a pig but doing so offends a cop who is standing a few feet away. Of course, the cop isn't paying attention and the scofflaw gets away. Kramer decides that he needs a new look and goes with an eye patch. George runs into Gary Fogel, a man who was having cancer and decided not to tell him. But he did tell Jerry, who reveals that he made himself nearly sick being nice to the guy. The next day, George meets with Gary, who drops a bombshell that he never actually had cancer and that the operation revealed that it was benign. Kramer decides to go apologize to the cop on his way to get a book signed by Elaine's ex-boyfriend Jake Jarmel (see episode The Sniffing Accountant). The cop reveals a story about a brown Dodge sedan that has become his white whale - the scofflaw has racked up more parking tickets than anyone in New York and that he almost nailed him until Kramer made his remark. Kramer goes to the book ... Written by halo1k

For the series' 100th episode, Jerry Seinfeld hosts a one hour retrospective with clips from previous episodes: the idea for a show about nothing; the smelly car; the puffy shirt; the astronaut pen; Jerry's hair; George's lack of hair; Mulva; Jerry's virgin girlfriend; the Hernandez incident; the outing; the masters of their domain; the bubble boy - are only a few of the episodes included. Written by garykmcd

Elaine attempts to convert a gay man to heterosexuality. Kramer sets George up with a woman and, not having a photograph, describes her to a police sketch artist. Jerry hooks up with a female officer who then has Jerry take a polygraph test on whether or not he's seen the show Melrose Place. Written by halo1k

Kramer tries to create a Utopian society when he puts up pictures of all the residents of his and Jerry's building. Jerry doesn't mind until the women of the building want to be greeted with a kiss. After Jerry objects to kissing hello, he's vilified and nearly kicked out of the building. Jerry also has to settle some family issues when Nana remembers that Uncle Leo was supposed to give Morty some money 50 years ago and Uncle Leo puts Nana in a home to keep her quiet. Meanwhile, Elaine's friend who is a chiropractor skips out on George's appointment and goes skiing instead, and they have a hard time telling her about her dated hairdo. Written by halo1k

Elaine house-sits for Mr. Pitt. Jerry goes to meet up with her to go to the movies and winds up offending the Doorman. So to make up for it, Jerry watches the door. But when Jerry leaves his post and the couch in the lobby is stolen, Jerry and Elaine formulate a plan to cover their tracks. Meanwhile, Kramer invents a bra for men and George tries to find a way to get his father out of his apartment. Written by halo1k

The gang has various encounters with a man named Jimmy, who talks about himself in the 3rd person. Elaine asks Jimmy to go to the benefit for the Able Mentally Challenged Adults organization starring Mel Torme. Thanks to Jimmy's shoes and getting too much Novocaine at Whatley's office, Kramer is mistaken for a mentally challenged man when he encounters the head of the AMCA. Jerry suspects Tim Whatley and his assistant are using patients for sexual pleasures when he finds pornographic magazines in Whatley's waiting room and thinks that he was violated while under the gas. George cuts a deal with Jimmy to sell Jimmy's shoes, but Jimmy gets injured thanks to Kramer's drooling. The deal, plus some spicy chicken, also helps Wilhelm accuse George of stealing some of the Yankee's batting equipment. Written by halo1k

Jerry is upset when he realizes he has fleas in his apartment. He's even more upset when he finds the source - Newman. He's going to have to have the place fumigated and will have to move out for a couple of days. His parents are coming for a visit however but he thinks he has the perfect solution when Elaine gets a job interview with Viking Press. She's told them she's from out of town so she can use their suite at the Plaza. Jerry's parents get to spend the weekend there. Unfortunately for Elaine, they have too good a time. Elaine is also desperate to get a manuscript Viking has sent her - but it's in Jerry's sealed apartment. George meanwhile is dating someone in Elaine's art class and can't help but wonder about the meaning of a doodle she's drawn. Written by garykmcd

Kramer gets new license plates, but a DMV screw-up gives him a new vanity license plate - ASS MAN. George's mom gets plastic surgery. Kramer makes pasta sculptures of his friends, and makes one out of Jerry using Fusilli pasta. Jerry tells Puddy about his move, which he proceeds to use on Elaine. He also tells George, but George screws it up, and his girlfriend gets freaked out when he uses crib notes. Kramer finally tracks down the Ass Man when Frank falls on the Fusilli Jerry and they have to take him to a proctologist. Written by halo1k

Jerry's new agent thinks he's a celebrity who needs his hand held on every little decision. After she tells him that the pilot who flew the plane to Ithaca is in the audience, Jerry freaks out. Kramer goes to the Diplomat's Club to meet up with Jerry and winds up gambling with a Texas business man on which plane is going to arrive first. Meanwhile, Mr. Pitt puts Elaine in his will, and Mr. Pitt's lawyer has reason to suspect that Elaine is up to something. Written by halo1k

Jerry scores premium tickets to a New Jersey Devils playoff game. He invites Kramer, Puddy, and Elaine along. But Jerry gets weirded out when Puddy shows up at the game and paints his face to match the team colors. Puddy gets so worked up after the game that he freaks out a visiting pastor from El Salvador, who is convinced that Puddy really is the devil. Elaine tries to convince him otherwise. Kramer enjoyed the game so much that he tries to convince Jerry to get more tickets from the guy Jerry got them from. Meanwhile, George decides to tell his girlfriend that he loves her, only to have the plans backfire on him while Kramer battles a chimpanzee at the zoo. Written by halo1k

Jerry dates the ultra-sensitive understudy for Bette Midler in Rochelle, Rochelle: The Musical. When the Improv is scheduled to play Rochelle Rochelle in a softball game, George plows into catcher Bette Midler to score the winning run. Bette is injured because of the incident and is unable to perform in the Broadway premiere. Jerry, George, and the understudy are vilified for the incident, and Kramer goes out of his way to help Bette. Meanwhile, Elaine suspects that a local nail shop is making fun of her in Korean. She learns that George's dad Frank speaks Korean and brings him along to spy on them. Frank recalls his time in the Korean war and how he had an affair with a young Korean woman. Elaine gets kicked out of the nail shop and wanders around aimlessly, and has a chance encounter with catalog magnate J. Peterman, who hires Elaine to work for the catalog. Written by halo1k

Jerry Seinfeld stars in this television comedy series as himself, a comedian. The premise of this sitcom is Jerry and his friends going through everyday life, discussing various quirky situations that we can all relate to (especially if we live in New York). The eccentric personalities of the offbeat characters who make up Jerry's social circle contribute to the fun. Written by Tad Dibbern [email protected]