Down on his luck aristocrat Pompidou lives in a caravan in the grounds of the ancestral pile with his dog Marion and butler Hove. With no food in the fridge Pompidou and Hove go fishing unsuccessfully and egg-hunting, landing in hospital when Hove swallows a bird. Pompidou successfully operates but they are still denied food and return to the caravan where another mishap awaits them. Written by don @ minifie-1

Hove wins the lottery and buys himself an enormous luxury caravan, leaving Pompidou to fend for himself, which he does very badly. When Pompidou gets evicted Hove employs him as his butler, reversing the roles, but Pompidou is useless. However Hove's caravan gets destroyed - thanks partly to Pompidou - and the old order is restored. Written by don @ minifie-1

Watching 'Heirloom Roadshow' on television Pompidou sees that a Chinese bowl he gave his friend Merrick for Christmas is worth a million pounds and sets out to retrieve it by substituting an imitation. Efforts to obtain one from a charity shop and a Chinese restaurant fail so he decides to make one at a pottery class but loses it. Back at the caravan he switches on 'Heirloom Roadshow' and is appalled to find that a student from the pottery class has had the bowl he made valued at two million pounds. Written by don @ minifie-1

Anxious for female company Pompidou goes to Sally's dating agency but is so particular that Sally bans him from her books. Later he sees her dining alone in a restaurant and decides to join her, hoping for a date. Unfortunately his greed and clumsiness means that Sally ends up paying the bill and his chances of a date being ruined forever. Written by don @ minifie-1

Hove is appalled at the amount of junk in Pompidou's caravan and tries to give it to a charity shop but it is rejected so he sets up a stall to sell it at the church jumble sale. Pompidou assumes various disguises in which to buy it back, including a pirate, a geisha, a Rasta and Freddie Mercury, this last disguise being so impressive that he is invited on stage to sing. Written by don @ minifie-1

The caravan is bitterly cold and the repair man refuses to come and fix the electric heater - leading Pompidou to try and set fire to a pile of chairs to keep warm. Hove stops him and suggest they go on holiday to sunnier climes but all they can afford is a camping holiday and, since outside is even colder, they decide to have it in the caravan, erecting the tent and starting a camp fire, which of course leads to disaster. Written by don @ minifie-1